losing weight

Sarah and I and a couple of friends have been challenging each other to loose weight since Jan 10 of this year. sarah and i have changed how we eat and we work out everyday or at least try to. We weigh in each month to see how much we have accomplished each month. I started this thing saying I just was ready to be smaller because I felt like I was getting to a scary size and weight. I was buying XXL shirts and sometimes having difficulty wearing dress shirts from department stores because they were not carrying a big enough size for me. I weighed in on Jan 10 at 274.4 pounds, which probably most people would not guess I weighed that much. I feel like I was on my way to 300 lbs if I did not change some things. So I did. I have not been drinking soft drinks, starbucks, sweet tea, or really anything but water for the most part. I have seriously cut portion sizes and typically eat healthy things. My diet consist of grapefruits, fiber one bars, sandwich & soups, and a healthy dinner. I probably drink 90 o. unces of water a day which is a lot of bathroom time. All this to say that these things are working. Middle of the morning today I weighed in at 225.0 lbs. Almost 50 lbs in 3 1/2 months. BUT. I have gotten to a place where I am scared now. I do not remember the last time I was smaller than 225 or so. Maybe my freshman year of high school I might have weighed 215-225, but I do not even remember for sure. I am not sure what I am going to look like being below 200 lbs. It sounds crazy to even talk about. I am scared that I will weigh that and still look at myself and think I am fatter than I want to be. I am scared that keeping myself that thin will beceome an obsession. I am scared that I will have lots of loose skin that I can not get rid of. Are these thoughts valid? Should they be considered? I do not know but as I continue to loose weight I continue to battle the inner struggles that kept me overweight and feeling like, "I am just a big guy." I just don't want to be the big guy in the room anymore. I want someone to look at me and say "hey little guy come over here" but I am still the guy called if they need something big or heavy moved because I am the big guy. These are my inner struggles currently as I strive to shred the fat & weight

Blogging

I think for most of you that are reading this, you are a blogger yourself on your own little blog url, so you might relate to this. Do you ever blog away your thoughts with hopes that people are going to read your blog and then respond in some form, fashion, or avenue? I think I did not originally begin the blog to have people comment, but since blogging away my thoughts on random subjects I have enjoyed the two, TWO, comments that I have received. The other day I am looking over my recent blog wondering if I had received any comments since it was a post that asked for some response back, and I see there is the number 1 beside the comment portion of my blog. I get a little excited thinking this is going to be a good response to the question I asked. I was wrong! It was a comment saying that I had not included this person in "the blogs that I read" section. I was glad to have received a comment, especially from this wonderful friend. BUT it was just not the comment I was looking forward to reading. Maybe you, yourself have had this very same situtation happen to you. Maybe that is the common thing that happens in the blogging world, but I am not sure I like that part of the blogging world. People want to know but not always be known. That kinda reminds me of a good thought. That God wants us to know Him and to make Him known. i wish i was more like God, He is so Godly!!! well that's enough for now.

Encouraging Spiritual Growth

I have realized that I do not have the power to make people grow spiritually with their relationship with God. I also know that I struggle with my own relationship with Him. The truth I know though is that God is real and without Him I would have nothing. I am not sure that others I know actually believe that. I truly believe people believe they would be alright if there was no such thing as the God of the Universe, the creator of all things everywhere. We live our lives with such oblivious ignorance to the fact that God desires a day by day moment by moment relationship with us, His creation. We think that swimming or fishing or basketball or cars or food or school or acceptance from others is more important than pleasing our heavenly Father. The devil is the father of all lies and he is here to steal, kill, and destroy. He steals our joy, he kills our worship with thoughts of other things, and he destroys our relationship with God by keeping us busy with unimportant things of life. I just do not understand how to motivate students, parents, or adults to pursue God whole-hearted with a zealous passion for Christ to be known, but to think of it and be truthful, I do not even know all the time myself. I realize all the time that I can not impress people to do things that they do not see me model for them. Godliness is desired because it is seen in others and portrayed by our Creator of the Universe. Thank you God for loving me in spite of my sinfulness and inability to do anything good without YOU. Turn my struggle into my strength for Your Glory and not my own.

Dang Good Day

I call this a swell of a day not because it was the best day ever or the best day in a long while but just because of several factors. I woke up this morning and I was in the 220's, which on Jan 10 I was 274. Then I made my daughter some dang good pancakes, which I did not partake cause I wanted to stay in the 220's. I then ran the fastest 22 laps around our gym that I have ran in competition, which is still a slow time by some people's standards. I then was able to eat some lunch, rest a bit, and then after Kailey woke up, headed off for some shopping with the girls. I ended up getting a new shirt for $8 and might I say it was a size L, which again on Jan 10 I only fitted into a XXL. Next we made our way to Rosa's Tortilla Factory where I was able to celebrate a bit, which was very nice to be able to experience. I love me some chicken soft tacos, chips & queso, and refried beans with rice. Goodness it was GOOD! Lastly we made our way home, where we suited up in our workout attire and walked/ran a couple of miles. It was a Dang Good Day!!!

working out

I discovered something today, even though I already knew it, if that is possible. Working out is usually difficult to do when no one wants to do it with you. I feel like every single person in the world, if stranded on an island for the rest of their by theirself, would not choose to workout. They might the first couple of days maybe even weeks but not longer than that. By the second week of working out by themself they would get bored and even consider what is the point of all this? I would dare to say there would not be a point. You really wouldn't want to live the rest of your life on a deserted island by yourself for the rest of your life. And suppose you did, would you really care whether you were skinny, overweight, or just right. There would not be anyone to compare yourself to. There would not be anyone who judged you or criticized you or thought less of you. But the truth is, if that is why you or I are working out, then we probably won't continue working out in our normal schedule of life in our regular cities of living. If we aren't working out and eating right for our own benefit and because we are Christ's temple, then we are probably doing it for the wrong reason anyways. You are always welcome to comment!

Learning Life

It feels like I have to learn how to live life every single week.

I get to places in my life where I feel like I should have this understood by now. The simple truth is that I don't though. Every day I need to wake up and say, "Lord, will You show me how to live today appropriate for today?"

When life gets to the point where you think you have it figured out, it changes on you. You think you are starting to get the hang of this routine and then BAM, things change. I was reading someone else's thoughts earlier today and they were talking about how God likes to interupt our lives when we get comfortable because when we get comfortable we feel like we are in control. How can I wake up every single day and tell God that if He doesn't direct my paths today then I will be an utter failure. For that matter, if God is not LORD of our lives we are completely and totally desolate. Do you agree or disagree?